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LIVE RATED
Truth or Dare Blog
Cuckold Blog
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The Best of Late Night...
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Tuesday, 20 February 2007 09:22 |
Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear On Valentine's Day
10."Ted, meet Carl - he's going to be joining us this evening"
9. "I got us two tickets to 'Norbit' "
8. "Don't hang up, directory assistance lady -- you're my Valentine!"
7. "There's a diaper-wearing astronaut at the door for you"
6. "If you want to cuddle afterward, it's another $50"
5. "Valentine's Day is on the 14th this year?"
4. "I got you the smallest box of chocolates because frankly, you're too damn tubby"
3. "We'll do something in a couple of days - it's Late Show Ventriloquist Week"
2. "I picked these flowers up at the cemetary"
1. "Table for one, Mr. Letterman!"
-David Letterman
"Valentine’s Day is the day you should be with the person you love the most. I understand Simon Cowell spent the day alone."
-Jay Leno
"The White Castle hamburger chain is offering couples a romantic Valentine’s Day dinner. White Castle says it’s the perfect way to tell that special someone your love is worth $3.99."
-Conan O'Brien
"Michael Jackson has introduced his own line of Valentine’s candy. It’s tremendous. It’s white chocolate with a nut inside."
-Jay Leno
"In schools now, all the kids have to give Valentines to all the other kids so nobody feels left out. I don’t get that. You’re just delaying the disappointment to later in life."
-Craig Ferguson
"This month a "Star Wars” memorabilia company started selling $120 replicas of Yoda’s light saber. After hearing about it, "Star Wars” fans said, "That’s ridiculous; for $120 we could lose our virginity."
-Conan O'Brien
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Posted by:
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Tuesday, 20 February 2007 09:23 |
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Excellent!!
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Tuesday, 20 February 2007 12:46 |
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